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Father's Day Jokes

Father's Day is the time to make your dad feel really happy and what better way to do so than make him smile? These amusing jokes revolving around fathers and fatherhood are sure to tickle your dad's funny bone this Father's Day and provide him with great mirth. Go through these funny Father's Day jokes and share them with your dad till you have him rolling out of his couch with laughter. If you like these Father's Day Jokes, click here and share them with your friends and dear ones. Happy Father's Day!

Enjoy these funfilled Father's Day jokes and use them in your Father’s Day greeting cards/e-cards/gift cards for dad.


The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present.
"Who of you is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says? Who..."
Five small voices answered in unison, cutting him short. "Okay, dad, you get the toy."


Car Issue

A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss the use of the car. His father took him to his study and said to him, "I'll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your bible a little and get your hair cut and we'll talk about it."

After about a month, the boy came back and again asked his father, if they could discuss use of the car. They again went to the father's study where his father said, "Son, I've been real proud of you. You have brought your grades up, you've studied your bible diligently, but you didn't get your hair cut."

The young man waited a moment and replied, "You know Dad, I've been thinking about that. You know, Samsom had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair!", to which is father replied, "Yes, you're right, and they also WALKED every where they went!"


Payback Time

On the day Mary received her learner's permit, her father agreed to take her out for a driving lesson. With a big grin, he hopped in behind the driver's seat.
"Why aren't you sitting up front on the passenger's side?" Mary asked.
"Mary, I've been waiting for this ever since you were a little girl," Dad replied. "Now it's my turn to sit back here and kick the seat."


Another Glass Of Water

"Daddy, Daddy, can I have another glass of water please?"
"But I've given you 10 glasses of water already!"
"Yes, but the bedroom is still on fire!"


Q. Do dads always snore?
A. No, only when they are asleep!


Top Ten Things You Will Never Hear A Dad Say

- Well, what do you know? I'm lost. We'll have to stop and get some directions.

- Well, honey, you are thirteen now. I bet you're ready for un-chaperoned car dates!

- I like all of your friends' "Up Yours" attitudes.

- Here are the keys to my new car. Oh, take my credit card, too. Have fun!

- Football? You want to play football? What about figure skating, son?

- Mom and I are going away for the weekend. Would you like to throw a party?

- No, I don't actually know what is wrong with your car.

- Son, let's go to the mall and get you an earring.

- You don't need a job! I have plenty of money for you to spend.

- Father's Day? Don't worry about that. It's no big deal!


 
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