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| Every 4th of July is America's Independence Day and it is time for some funfilled celebration. A bunch of jokes can add much amusement to an occassion and that is why here we have provided you with some hilarious jokes on America and Americans that every inhabitant of the U.S is sure to enjoy during the occassion. If you like these July 4 Jokes, click here and share them with your friends and dear ones. You can also use these on your festive e-cards/greeting cards/gift cards or sms messages. So make good use of the July 4 jokes and have a rocking time! |
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| Check out these rib-tickling jokes and enjoy yourself on July 4.
Winter Statistics 98% of Americans say "OH S$!&" before going in the ditch on a slippery road. The other 2% are from Buffalo or Rochester, NY and they say, "Hold my beer and WATCH THIS!" Urgent Notice Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions and a few trillion dollars in bailouts for some corporations, the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off. We apologize for the inconvenience. How many American tourists does it take ... How many American tourists does it take to change a light bulb? Fifteen. Five to figure out how much the bulb costs in the local currency, four to comment on "how funny-looking" local lightbulbs are, three to hire a local person to change the bulb, two to take pictures, and one to buy postcards in case the pictures don't come out. Q: Why do americans fail in the banana selling buisness? A: Everytime they see a bent banana they would throw it away. A normal american guy bought the fastest and newest car ever created. He entered the car and turned on the radio ; He heard : "This Is London!" The man said : DAMN this thing is FAST! One American guy traveled to China on a trip. He got on a bus, and sat right behind the driver. There was too much traffic. The man said : "Man why is there so much people?" The bus driver said: "You're right, in Chinnna, evere minute there is a child born." The man said: "See that's what makes americans better , because in america every 9 months there is a child born!" 1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. 2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. 3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. 4. Only in America......do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet coke. 5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. 6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. 7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. 8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. 9. Only in America.....do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. 10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. 11. Only in America......can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House. (This was popular when Clinton was in office). |
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